Downside: Most people constantly crank about lack of perception

There will be no baby strollers and no dogs allowed in the run portion of the event at this Sunday’s April 11 – here comes the long title - 8th Annual Lower Delaware Autism Foundation Half Marathon and 5K race which disembarks - no barking rule is in effect - from Irish Eyes on Anglers Road. A Kiddie K begins at 7:50 a.m., the half marathon begins at 8, and the 5K starts at 8:15. A new summer series included the LDAF Half (13.1 miles), North Beach 5K (3.1 miles) July 11, and Bottle & Cork 10-Miler Sept. 11, three races that add up to the marathon distance of 26.2 miles. How fast can you run a marathon? If you average an eight-minute pace, you will run a 3:47 marathon. Walk-up registration is $50 for the half, $25 for the 5K and an extra $10 for the marathon series. The Kiddie K is $10 per entry. Check out races2run.com for all the details.

LOITER AND RECONNOITER - We locals own this place so the rest of y’all can just get on out of here. Last Tuesday half past the bluebird special social hour I was doing a gazebo kickback down by the forbidden boat ramp in Lewes when my friend Richard Perez of Lewes Body Works approached by sea on his two-seat WaveRunner. Richard told me he had just taken a picture of a brown harbor seal on the floating dock at Steamboat Landing and its tail was tagged so it obviously had previous interaction with tail-tagging humans and we all know plenty of them.

ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP - The economy is tough; people are underemployed but plenty of jobs exist in officiating sporting events and maybe even weddings - just call yourself a preacher; they seem to be all over the place. I’d venture to say if a person went out and got certified, canonized and lobotomized to officiate football, soccer, field hockey, basketball, volleyball, wrestling, baseball, softball and lacrosse and was willing to work all day any day at all levels, a person could make 50 grand a year.

The downside is that most people constantly crank on about your lack of perception and just assume you are dishonest. Trust me, the last person who cares who wins is the official. Next come the sportswriters.

TWO FOR TEBOW - Pencil this possibility into your fantasy football notebook right next to the collage of cheerleaders stuck to the inside cover with Elmer’s glue. The Eagles use the McNabb No. 2 pick acquired from the Redskins and choose Tim Tebow, then have Timmy Boy room with Mikey Dog Vick and they become best of friends. Mike Vick will stay an Eagle because if “Kolb is a klunker,” Vick will come to the rescue with fast people flying all over the field and Eagles fans will bark and growl in frenzied excitement like pound dogs at feeding time.

SNIPPETS - Atlantic Lacrosse takes to Hudson Fields this Saturday, April 10, with age group games beginning at 9 a.m. Beach Lacrosse from Ocean City, Md., is the visiting program and they are very good. There should be some great battles. I am told numbers are up for Lewes Little League. The baseball park always generates some great stories. The Cape boys lacrosse team will host St. Mark’s at 2 p.m., Saturday. The junior varsity game will follow at 3:30. The Cape girls lacrosse team will put it on the line Saturday, traveling to Baltimore City to face Seton Keough. Junior varsity action begins at noon with the varsity game scheduled for 1:15. The annual Keith Burgess Invitational Track Meet begins at 11 a.m., Saturday at Lake Forest High School. Kara Voss, a freshman at the University of Delaware and former outstanding Cape defender in field hockey and lacrosse, has been invited to spring practice by the Blue Hens field hockey team. My dog Darby loves the sport of catching brown wasps in his mouth. He is one tough, dumb dude.