If the gates of heaven squeak, Doney will let St. Peter know

“You have 22 minutes on this section - you may begin. Stop when you hear the bell.”
Everyone was conditioned like SPCA stimulus/response dogs and about mid-morning the bell rang followed by Doney’s voice, “Breyers calling!”

Teachers like me cracked up remembering the popular television commercial, the serious sect thought it was too playful, students responded, “Breyers? Who is Breyers and why is he calling?”

Two weeks after the test Cape received a letter from the state superintendent chastising them for their frivolous behavior specifically referencing the “Breyers calling” remark by the proctor. The entire test results were threatened to be invalidated and the school fined. Principal Mike Mock called a meeting, his big motor head got all red, and he went off in his roundabout way, but Doney, as always, was unapologetic.

The state superintendent’s office denied writing the letter and knew nothing of “Breyers calling!” The veterans on the staff knew it was a “Hickman Letter” written by teacher Tom Hickman who, by the way, never owned up to the prank.

John Doney, one of my first friends when I came to Lewes back in 1975, said at a social function a few years back, “You know my friends would come down the School Lane Road to my house to visit my parents. They didn’t even ask if I was home.”

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t a good idea. I show up everywhere, including professional football press boxes, and here is a news flash and my traveling photographer Dan Cook would agree with me. The most fun is covering athletes in your hometown, including middle school; it is just the best.

Last Wednesday I visited Mariner then Beacon and interviewed some kids for athletes of the week and I have never had that much fun doing an Eagles story. The fact that we even care what some of these surly professionals have to say about anything is proof that we need to refocus our attention on kids.

HOMECOMINGS - Why do homecomings and spirit weeks continue when nobody comes home while school spirit is not something you’re looking for in the hallways during school hours? And choosing royalty by grade is a bit of reinforcing the popular in-crowd cliques, don’t you think?

I know it’s about kids having fun, but if you take 800 kids in any high school, 600 of them think it is all pretty lame. Cape has Polytech for homecoming; Sussex Tech has St. Georges; Delaware hosts William and Mary; and Delaware State hosts the Aggies of North Carolina A&T.

This is the family hour and nothing more American than baseball. It didn’t come up in the Wednesday night debate - I ain’t trying to be funny - but do you remember when John McCain was asked how he felt about insurance companies covering Viagra but not birth control? McCain looked like “why you gotta be asking me” and said he never thought about the issue.

Here’s the deal, Janet Jackson and the Super Bowl pop-out is nothing compared to drug companies hijacking a sports audience with personal problem products. Go with the Flomax you flummox!

SNIPPETS - As a true Phillies fan I am now refocusing my franchise hatred toward the city of Tampa, leading the American League series 3-1 at the time of this writing. Tampa didn’t support its team all year so those fans are not worthy. And why exactly did they drop the Devil from Rays? The new Rays refer to a beacon of light and I’m like, “Please shut up and step up and get your beat down” before returning to your St. Petersburg Viva Viagra retirement community. How much fun is it to have your team in the World Series, which is way better than the glitzy Super Bowl which this year has Bruce Springsteen for halftime further confusing the Afro-American fan base.
Coach J.D. Maull at the newly created St. Georges school that is playing all away games without a senior class wanted me to extend his encouragement to the Cape coaches and players and to tell them all to “hang in there.”

At Point Park College of Pittsburgh senior goalkeeper Steve Fabian has been named the American Mideast Conference men’s soccer defensive player of the week for the week of Oct. 6-12. Fabian (Milton/Cape Henlopen) made 30 saves and yielded only one goal in two games last week. A four-year starter for the Pioneers, Fabian made 14 saves Saturday in a 2-0 victory over AMC opponent Malone. The win marked Fabian’s third shutout of the season. Fabian is a former starting goalie for Cape Henlopen. Viva Vikings!