That’s what most guys do because we’re always ready to be nursed

Tim Stauffer was the fourth pick in the 2003 Major League draft chosen by the San Diego Padres. The University of Richmond right-hander is the nephew of lawyer Bill Schab of Lewes. He is the son of Bill’s sister Becky and her husband Rick. Tim, as I like to call him, surrendered two earned runs on four hits and a walk in seven frames of seven-strikeout ball versus the Giants on Saturday in his first loss of the season.

He is coming off shoulder surgery for a partial labrum tear. Did I mention he was the fourth pick? Stauffer would be a good get for the Phillies before the trading deadline and I have it on unreliable insider information the Phillies know of him and he is on their radar screen. Stauffer is in the final year of his Major League contract.

TYLER TOWNSEND - Tyler Townsend was 2-for-5 with two runs, a home run and three RBIs last Saturday for the Aberdeen Ironbirds in a 12-inning, 14-10 loss to the Hudson Valley Renegades.

Townsend has three doubles and a home run in 12 games for the Orioles farm club.

BIT BY A TICK - It was one of those deadly Comcast interludes featuring some know-nothing dude who was promoting his wife’s book on long-term Lyme disease, which is not recognized by the AMA because everyone will think they have it. But the interviewer started off asking, “What should you do if you are bit by a tick?” and he answered, “Well the first thing if you are bit by a tick…”

And I hollered at the flat screen, “The word is bitten! What should you do if you are bitten!” It’s like coaches who say “We seem to be snake bit” and I usually respond, “Snake bit? Don’t you mean bitten, like I was bitten, not I was bit.” Here’s the deal: people have real jobs in journalism or consider themselves writers and those jokers mangle the language but no one seems to notice.

LEARNED HELPLESSNESS - I am a teacher and reporter, a coach and problem solver. Last week I sat back in a chair and listened to Nurse Dot conducting a seminar on “Here’s what is going to happen to you when you come in for joint replacement.”

She was sharp and informative but I basically shut it down because my wife Susan was taking notes. That’s what most guys do because we are always ready to be nursed. I pity the woman who needs nursing from her husband because mostly men are no good at it.

NATIONAL PARKS - The striking thing about recreation inside national parks is the absence of “no” signs. We are all used to being told “No” when considering venturing into unsafe areas.

Last July 8, famed free solo rock climber – no ropes or safety equipment - John Bacher, a legend of the sport and 52 years old, fell to his death on a Yosemite Park climb. Nearby climbers said they heard him fall but more likely they heard him land.

SNIPPETS - I found it just bizarre to watch Ray Lewis delivering a speech at the Steve McNair funeral and to address comments directly to McNair’s sons, “I am here for you - anything you need.”

I was at the 2000 Super Bowl in Atlanta and had been in trendy Buckhead the night before Ray Lewis and his posse were shot at by other posses on the sidewalk as the former ‘Canes sped off in a rented stretch Gator - the irony - and two bodies lay dead on the street. Ray was on television the next morning and I watched Titans in the lobby of the Embassy Suites watching Ray in orange jump suit and shackles. McNair, always a solid citizen, could never have guessed that Ray Ray would be eulogizing him nine years later.

And Arturo Gatti, a 38-year-old, 140-pound boxer with 31 knockouts in his career, was strangled with a purse strap by his 23-year old Brazilian wife while Gatti was passed out drunk - just another feel-good story for the sports pages.

Eagles fans may remember the 1976 murder of defensive end Blenda Gay by his wife who cut his throat while he slept. There was talk that Gay had abused his wife Roxanne for years, but when it all came out in the wash she was determined to be schizophrenic and was committed to Trenton State Psychiatric Hospital and all charges were dropped.

My grandmother always said, “Sleep like a cat with one eye open and your ears piqued.” Those were words of wisdom.