What a great idea...in an Alfred Hitchcock kind of way

Feed me information. And while you’re at it feed me free food. I cover professional and college sports, and they give me all kinds of information and food because they understand sportswriters work for food and won’t look too hard for elusive information. Sometimes at high school events I ask for a CPD, then have to explain “Complimentary Press Dog” which makes boosters people mad because they’re already sliding down the social ladder working as a hot dog dispenser and don’t see me as any better than them. But I am total access man; my story of the game reaches thousands of readers who elect to stay at home watching sports on television before rocking back and forth just to get enough momentum to lift off the couch to microwave some Lebanon bologna and provolone cheese on a plate of herbal Triscuits. I was at Milford baseball last Tuesday and a lacrosse game at Sussex Tech on Wednesday and there were no programs in either house, but at least the announcers didn’t know the names of the players except for a couple. In Milford it was just last names of the home team, which doesn’t make a player feel very special, while at Tech some home players were identified, others were not and no Cape players, just numbers. What happened to the technological revolution?

SUPER FREAKY - “What are you making with that jigsaw? Is that a guy who makes pizzas?” “No, honey bunny, it’s a lacrosse goalie so players can practice framing shots.

“You know, the old hit them where they ain’t.” I saw goalie Sarah May “fronting” Psycho goalie last Wednesday at practice and I thought,

“What a great idea, but just a little eerie in an Alfred Hitchcock kind of way.” So where is the guy who makes Psycho goalie in his wood shop? I think football is the leader when it comes to silly coaching props like tackling dummies, air shields, old tires, seven-man sleds and punting machines.

WORK VERSUS WORK OUT - My neighbor friend John Beach has never been in a weight room in his life or had his body fat measured, of which he has none. John recently got two free truckloads of firewood delivered - you know, the entire tree - and spent only a week cutting it into lengths and stacking it; some lengths are still six to eight feet long and all the big stumps are stacked together. John did all the cutting and moved all this stuff himself because when a man is focused there is just no stopping him. Working for its own sake is slightly illogical; I mean, what’s the point?

SNIPPETS - A report on philly.com listed Villanova as spending five million dollars a year on its basketball program. I think the argument is over about whether major Division 1 college basketball and football programs are an extension of the educational experience or something else like minor league developmental programs for the professional leagues. A major difference is that there is no payroll for college teams so universities reap all the profits, which is cool, and many of the players take advantage and get an education but many others do not. And who cares about recruiting violations? The entire educational system is being violated, and most recruiting violates some rule; trust me or ask anyone who was fortunate enough to be actively recruited by multiple big-name schools. Corey Schab, the fluid midfielder who helped Cape capture a state championship in lacrosse in 2006 is now playing for the Poets of Whittier College in San Diego, Calif,. where he takes face-offs and is on every team including man up and man down. Corey and the Poets are making an eastern swing and those friends eager to watch him play can catch game action at Goucher College in Baltimore at 1 p.m., Saturday, March 28, then at Wesley in Dover at 4 p.m., Tuesday, March 31, and at 7 p.m., Wednesday, April 1, at McDaniel College in Westminster, then at 11 a.m., Saturday, April 4, versus Christopher Newport at the Severn School in Annapolis. Now I’m done!