You must be crazy; ain’t nobody going into no hot-dog store

There is something funny about a hot-dog shirt. Under Armour, Adidas and Nike are all safely cool at athletic events, so is wearing the logo of your favorite pro or college football team, but rocking Hot Dog Johnny’s from Buttzville, N.J., shows me a man secure in who he is and where he comes from. Joe Kehoe, 69, who now lives in Milton, ran in last Sunday’s Greene Turtle 5K in 30:39. Whatever happened to Swanky Franks in Dover? I once pulled in there with a van of track athletes who responded, “Coach Fred, you must be out your mind. Ain’t nobody going into no hot-dog store. Swanky Franks, Fredman? Coach, you go get your dumb dog, then take us to McDonald’s.”

The real Slim Shady - Frank Shade, former paramedic and still president of the World Championship Punkin Chunkin Association, has lost over 100 pounds as he keeps reminding me by just standing there looking all skinny. Frank is currently director of Sussex County fleet management, and I didn’t even know we had a navy. Frank is running for political office seeking the Democratic nomination for the 37th Representative District. I know this because I saw his signs west of the Georgetown circle on my way back from the Cape at Seaford football scrimmage last Saturday, then on Sunday there was Frank volunteering at the Greene Turtle 5K in support of the Wellness Center – Delaware. I met Russ Melrath, 62, from Bethany who agreed to run the race in a Shade shirt in exchange for being able to trade it in later for a Hot Dog Johnny’s shirt if Frank loses the nomination. Russ ran a 32:49, took off the shirt and tried to give it back to Frank, saying, “I always run without a shirt.”

Way bogus - Brett Favre is as much a Viking as the dudes in the Capital One commercials. How unbelievably stupid and tolerant does the NFL believe fans to be? Half the season ticket holders can’t give away preseason tickets that come with a parking pass and cooler of hoagies and Jell-O shooters. Selling hype is insulting, and any single game can’t hold the attention of anyone not drunk - a distinct difference between paying attention and being in a stupor - that’s why the Sunday ticket is so popular and the NFL redzone channel.

I marvel that a multimillionaire who lives in a Mississippi mansion behind locked gates is heading into year 20 as an NFL quarterback.

That fact screams at me, “This is all you got? How weak is this league? Kevin Kolb is a great athlete? Kyle Orton?” You watch Tim Tebow take that starting job in Denver because I understand those Christian Contact guys.

They batter you with chosen one certainty then hand you a prayer card as you wait for your eyes to refocus.

I have not been on the Tebow train ever, but right now I’m thinking he is a throwback football player. Throwing forward may be his problem.

Snippets - Cape sent the junior varsity field hockey team to the Seaford play day because only so many varsity play days are allowed and no surprise that the girls were one of the best teams there.

Cape’s junior varsity team last season went undefeated; Beacon and Mariner were both powerhouses, and I will go out on a limb here and say that the

Cape varsity is a top five team in the state and the junior varsity is a top 10 team.

The Cape volleyball team had a Saturday morning play day at Delmarva Christian. Coach Carrie Serman said, “We are running a new offense this year, a 5-1.

“This allows Johnesha Warren to set herself up to take swings at the net and also to set up her teammates.

“Brianna Marsico transitioned into the role of libero very well, serving and digging some hard-hit balls.

“My middles, Hailee Gooch and Kadijah Doughty, were great at the net, blocking hits from the other side.

“We are well on our way to a successful season. We are back into the gym for the next two weeks to fine-tune.”

Nettie Choice, former Cape and Wesley College player, is the new head volleyball coach at Campus Community in Dover.

The Cougars play in the Diamond State Conference, which includes Delmarva Christian, Red Lion Christian, Archmere Academy, Wilmington Christian and St. Thomas More.

Nettie is a great name for a volleyball coach. Go serve somebody, Nettie!