How do you punish kids who don’t care?

You just have to be related to travel 30 miles to watch an away girls soccer game of two 40-minute halves that begins at 7 p.m. And last Tuesday, with the Vikings leading at Lake Forest 1-0 at halftime, the game was suspended because of storms, and so on Wednesday, the teams were back on the pitch only to wait out another storm. Cape finally won the contest 4-0 on a pair of goals from Tricia Colucci and single scores from Brittany Morris and Cassie McLaughlin. The junior varsity lost its game 2-1. Cape is home Friday, April 24, hosting Sussex Central.

SUSPENDED ANIMATION - An athlete spending a day in the “in-school suspension” room is ineligible to participate in after-school activities because “They be suspended!”

The placement in this vacuum of suspended animation on any particular day is more or less random, and when factoring in rescheduled rainouts it becomes problematic for a coach filling out a lineup card. Nonathletes don’t have to worry about after-school stuff because their after school is no school. I often thought that suspended athletes should be able to pick the day they are suspended to avoid missing games, but I was told, “Where is the moral lesson?” and I would answer, “When is the last time you actually went to a game to cheer for a kid?”

There was a brief program of punishment called “extended school,” where a student went to regular classes, followed by a two-hour extended school like a scheduled time out, and then if they had a game they couldn’t play because they were suspended even though they had been in school and on lockdown for eight hours.

The bottom line is, “Punish athletes while you have something they care about to hold over their heads.” But how do you punish - is that the correct word - kids who don’t care about much of anything?

BEST BALL! - How is my fragile ego supposed to handle never being best ball in a four-person scramble on an 18-hole shotgun start? On Monday, May 11, the Sussex Family YMCA will hold its 17th annual golf tournament and auction at the Rehoboth beach Yacht and Country Club, and for the 17th straight year, I will miss it.

There are prizes for longest drive - we’re not talking golf cart - and closest to the pin on par threes. Boulevard Ford, First State Chevrolet and i.g. Burton are sponsoring prizes for this charity event so lace up your high-top Chuck Taylors and get on out there. For more information contact the YMCA at 296-9622.

COED RELAYS - Cape placed second to Milford at the recent co-ed relays but did nail down some first-place finishes. The 4-by-100 shuttle hurdle team of Donna Davis, Vince Vasquez, Malcolm Mapp and Shellie Pearsall won gold in a time of 1:05. The 4-by-200 team of Stephan Hixon, Shellie Pearsell, Laquan Hazzard and Arvantis Smith placed first with a time of 1:38.7. The triple-jump relay team, consisting of Rebecca Pepper, 34-9 and Vinnie Vasquez, 38-1, combined for a distance of 72-10, earning first place.

SNIPPETS - Don’t forget on Saturday, June 13, the DRFC Blue-Gold 5K race will set off from Irish Eyes in Lewes. Wednesday, June 17, there are all-star football scrimmages with the Gold at Milford and the Blue at Tower Hill. The game will be played Saturday, June 20, at Delaware Stadium. Race Director Wayne Kursh has joined the hip-replacement club and is currently rehabbing at home in a recliner while watching the high-definition flat screen. Dave Kergaard, fitness trainer, will get his “other hip” done in June, then my avoidance-avoidance personality type will have the procedure done in June. There is an entire tribe of limping people out on the Great Plains, all incapable of fleeing from danger. “I’m ready to go anywhere, I’m ready for to fade into my own parade,” says Bob Dylan.

Saturday, May 25, the Rehoboth Little League opens the season at 10 a.m. with a parade commencing at the Little League Park. A special 50-year celebration is scheduled for Georgetown Little League beginning at 9:30. Talk about profiling! Florida police pulled over a 2009 Mercedes for “excessive tint” and inside was a “toked up” Jimmy Smith, retired five-time all-pro NFL receiver, who had marijuana, crack and cocaine residue in his car, but at least he was driving on a suspended license. I saw Smith in person, waived by the Eagles early in his career, catch 10 balls for 225 against the Ravens. I swear people are all the way crazy!