Don’t put the blame on McDonald’s or pizza or hoagies

April 14 was the golden anniversary of McDonald’s and they are still rocking introducing new products like McGriddle cakes and sausage not to mention Happy Meals for grouchy children. So what about the plague of fatty meats and cheese, partially hydrogenated oils, high-fructose corn syrup and too much salt? Who takes the blame for an American epidemic of obesity, heart disease, diabetes and other expensive and debilitating diet-related health conditions?

At the grand opening of McDonald’s in Bristol 50 years ago I stomped right up to the counter, got a bag of seven hamburgers for a dollar, a potato sack of skinny fries from the deep fryer and a strawberry milkshake.

I sat with my friends and we ate like Tom Cats, lean and prowling males taking a midday break.

Join a gym, pump iron, ride a stationary bike to nowhere and eat what you want showing just a modicum of restraint. Don’t blame McDonald’s or pizza or hoagies, you partially hydrogenated hydrohead.

SPORTS LEGENDS - Harry Kalas died in the press box not because he wanted to but rather because he wouldn’t leave. That’s the way it is for those of us with jobs in sports. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks - all you can do is run him out of the yard. I remember Harry as the guy from the Houston Astros. Harry replaced Bill Campbell who called the Eagles’ championship win over the Packers on radio. Bill Campbell was the voice of the Eagles, Warriors and Phillies and still shows up in the Eagles press box and looks dynamite for a guy who’s 86 and who’s been retired for 40 years.

Merle Reese took over from Campbell in 1966 doing Eagles radio which gives him 43 years on the job. Kalas and Ashburn on a broadcast reminded me of the Smothers Brothers. Richie was from Nebraska and Harry from Iowa - best friends who survived together on radio and television for all those games in the quickly critical culture of Philadelphia. Last January Kalas was the emcee for the Delaware Sports Writers and Broadcasters banquet. He told a couple of stories that were inappropriate for a high school audience which made it all the better because he was Harry Kalas. And he introduced local physical therapist John Knarr among many others and John will always have that memory.

SOGGY BOGGY BREAKDOWN - Parents with multiple housebound children on vacation will burst into the sunlight this weekend as the weather threatens to be nice enough to play games which is what we Americans do best. On Friday, April 17, Cape’s baseball team will host Milford at 1 p.m. then travel to Salesianum on Saturday. Softball will host St. Elizabeth on Saturday. The co-ed relays are at the Cape track on Saturday and will begin at noon. Cape lacrosse will host a showdown with Salesianum on Saturday at 6 p.m. All Atlantic lacrosse teams will be in action on Saturday morning.

Delaware State will play its spring football Red and White game on Saturday beginning at 2:30. Remember the Hornets open at Delaware and also have Michigan on the schedule.

There is a tripleheader of alumni basketball action at Cape’s Little Big house on Friday night beginning at 6 p.m. Cape‘s alumni will close the action at 8:30 with a game against Milford. Admission is $5.

UPTOWN BOY - Back when I roamed North Broad Street in Philly while matriculating and skipping classes at Temple, I had a fake license I had gotten from baseball pitcher Tom Kirby so I could walk into bars and absorb culture. The Uptown Bar is across the street from the Uptown Theater, where I saw James Brown and B.B. King perform live and the Cadillac Bar, where I sat five feet from Fats Domino. Tom Kirby was black and I am still not, but the joke always got me admittance. Domino, as you know, was rescued by helicopter during Katrina and was given shelter by Raiders quarterback JaMarcus Russell in Baton Rouge because JaMarcus’ girlfriend was the granddaughter of Fats Domino.

SNIPPETS - Maren Ford, a Cape and Princeton graduate, was recently selected to the 2009-10 U.S. Women’s National Indoor Hockey team. Maren rose to the top at tryouts held the end of March at the Winning Edge Sports Center in Oaks, Pa.

Wednesday, April 22, from 5 to 8 p.m., at Bob Evans is a fundraiser for the Cape baseball team. The old 15 percent of the proceeds trick.

Joe Thomson has resigned as basketball coach at Sussex Tech to devote all his time to his dual jobs as athletic and transportation director. Sources tell me anything I want to hear, but I’m pretty sure the new coach is Steve Perry who is the grandson of Lib Stewart who was the last holdout in Shipcarpenter Square (Little Green House). Only in a local paper can a 50-year-old man be referenced as someone’s grandson.