Dogfish Dash has raised $1 million for environmental non profits since 2008

Cut to the quip - Quick wit takes intelligence, perception and a broad-based knowledge of all things trivial and intricate, not to mention esoteric and extraordinary. Scott Hanson, host of the NFL RedZone, is that guy. When he says, “Let’s go to the octobox,” viewers get ready to process eight games simultaneously from different feeds around the country. On Sunday, a camera went to a closeup of a Jets fan who was dropping an F-bomb expression on the head of quarterback Zach Wilson when his upper partial came loose, looking like a wad of Double Bubble gum. The guy just pushed it back up into place and Hanson quipped, “Fix it with Fixodent.” That was the most creative color commentary I heard all weekend.  

Art appreciation - I look at a painting of a setting sun over a field of barley and I see a soothing scene that relaxes me, so, professor, please don’t describe it in detail beyond that, because you are messing with my soul. Football analysts rub me the same way. Stop explaining what’s really going on and let me watch the game. I’ve known football coaches who could talk the talk but in reality were clueless. Remember the year 2000 when comedian Dennis Miller was in the booth for Monday Night Football with Al Michaels and Dan Fouts? The camera went close on a player’s knees showing multiple scars from surgeries. Miller said, “That guy’s been scoped more times than a redneck abducted by aliens.” 

Dogfish dogged - The Dogfish Dash since its inception in 2008 has raised more than $1 million for the Delaware Center for the Inland Bays, which is great yet ironic because extract humans from the brackish brine of the backwater ecosphere, and fish could breathe again without blowing bubbles from their gills. There were 1,431 finishers in the race. I took 3,000 photos. I started to process and post them, coordinating with the 1 p.m. kickoffs of NFL games, and finished at the end of the Phillies game, which started at 6, and moved into Sunday Night Football. I focus like a football coach – tasks are not to pursue but rather to knock down to clear the clutter, and I’m motivated by the same two words that inspire a player: “Good job!” 

Painter’s ladder - I stood two steps high establishing my supremacy over 1,500 happy runners at the start of  the Dogfish Dash, many zany enough to knock me from my perch, crashing me to the road below like a porcelain silverback from the Philadelphia Zoo gift shop. I hear my name called a thousand times, “Fredman!” but I don’t process faces once the race begins – too busy staying airborne like a paratrooper who won’t leave the plane – and at the finish I focus on bibs, not faces. Only later from my home office do I see Tiara Duffy and Tessa Brooks and my former hurdler Greg Pope. 

Seventies state champions - There are four Cape state championship teams from the 1970s that are iconic and legendary and should never be compared to teams from another era. They include girls’ basketball (1973), boys’ basketball (1975), football (1979) and field hockey (1979). There were other state title teams from the ’70s (I coached a couple, so get off my case), but those four are always hands off even though they couldn’t hang with teams today. I’m kidding – I’m such a jokester, just rattling cages! Nothing compares across decades, so stop throwing down your UNO Reverse card on today's players, most of whom have no interest in history that happened before the outlet malls.  

Snippets - Big field hockey games this week with Delmar at Smyrna Tuesday, Sept. 26, and Milford at Cape Thursday, Sept. 28.  I am aware that I don’t follow the WNBA playoffs. The semifinal matchups are New York Liberty hosting the Connecticut Sun and Las Vegas Aces hosting the Dallas Wings. Go to wnba.com if interested. Coker University field hockey beat Lincoln Memorial in overtime 1-0. Freshman goalie Eve Sekscinski (Milford) went the distance in goal for the win. Her dad Frank Sekscinski played football and basketball for the Cape Class of 1988. The Salesianum Invitational Cross Country Meet on the legendary Brandywine Creek State Park Course (crazy hills) takes off at 10 a.m., Saturday, Sept. 30. Shakedown Saturday should focus the power hierarchy of Delaware’s best teams. Go on now, git!